kiss-da-girl:

sageonyx:

justdilla:

Bless whoever made this.

*Cries real tears*

(Source: megahra, via 1-url-to-rule-them-all)

southern-feminism:

kosmonaughtybarbie:

kateordie:

This comic is about how there are two sides to every story.

on point

A guy insulting his ex to “compliment” you is always a red flag.

southern-feminism:

kosmonaughtybarbie:

kateordie:

This comic is about how there are two sides to every story.

on point

A guy insulting his ex to “compliment” you is always a red flag.

(via 1-url-to-rule-them-all)

pussreboots:

potassiumcyanide:

samaelcarver:

wattthefisk:

Amazing cosplays!

Our bad-assed collection of amazing cosplays!

….HOLD THE FUCK UP!!!!

Is that first one an Assassins Creed version of Captain Jack Sparrow?????

Holy shit these are awesome

Team Rocket!

(via 1-url-to-rule-them-all)

dontwannasaygoodbye:

Explaining tumblr to someone who doesn’t know what it is is seriously the hardest thing to do

(via -annoying)

mamalaz:

Avengers Actually Assembled

A world where film studio rights don’t exist and all of Marvel exists as one place.

(via color-me-cloudy)

One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
Love, Dad.

Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love” (via perverted—princess)

(Source: slambien, via fireelsa)

strokemyglabella:

perkeleen-tursas:



perfect usage of that gif

strokemyglabella:

perkeleen-tursas:

perfect usage of that gif

(via janemate)

detectivanilla:

percymyjackson:

So my driving teacher has three fingers on one hand and four on the other and he makes puns about it and it’s great. And today he was like “I went to the museum and found my ancestors’ look guys!” And showed us this…

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE NOTES

detectivanilla:

percymyjackson:

So my driving teacher has three fingers on one hand and four on the other and he makes puns about it and it’s great.
And today he was like
“I went to the museum and found my ancestors’ look guys!”
And showed us this…

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE MORE NOTES

(via weeping-angels-take-the-ponds)

(Source: tiit, via spatzula)